I Wish I Had a Provocative Headline Tonight… But I Don’t…

Yesterday I wrote about my never wanting to be my age, and in the spirit of gratitude, one thing I am grateful for is that my wants, desires, and aspirations have changed, and dare I say, matured, with age.

When I was younger, I wanted material possessions, and now, what I desire most is self-acceptance, confidence, and self-assuredness.

However, when I wanted material possessions like designer handbags, clothes, and cars, a part of it was definitely about stature and popularity, but I think another part of it may have been freedom. I really wanted to drive and have freedom and my independence from a very young age.

Now, I desire less for material possessions, however, my desire for freedom still burns very strongly. Money symbolizes freedom to me, so the idea of having a lot of money, so much money that I never have to think or worry about money, excites me very much as having that much money seems extremely soothing and comforting. I know things change and nothing is permanent, but being a billionaire, I would imagine does give a certain sense of security. For example, Mark Zuckerberg has so much money, that in 2013, he opted for an annual salary of $1, meaning that’s how little he needs money or that’s how little he is consumed with getting more money for himself.

Screen Shot 2018-01-22 at 8.43.15 PM

But then, I see graphics like this and am reminded that according to many people, true happiness comes from within and not from a person, place, thing, or how much money I have.

So, now for today’s gratitude as it is day 10 of 10 days of gratitude!

Gratitude Day 10

  1. At night, sometimes, on the way home from a friend’s house, I drive by these tents covered with tarps, where a group of what I presume is homeless people live. They are located right by a highway entrance in a pretty central location, but they are tucked in the middle of a few trees. I’ve driven past them when the temperatures are freezing and sometimes they have a fire burning, and I can see clothes hanging on a clothes line. That puts a lot of things in perspective for me and makes me feel sad and grateful at the same time.
  2. I want more
  3. Feelings aren’t facts
  4. Feelings change
  5. Feelings pass
  6. It’s day 62 of my content challenge
  7. I got my period today
  8. Getting my period causes hormonal changes and helps me to understand why I have been feeling emotionally and physically more sensitive than usual
  9. Took a bubble bath this evening
  10. Going to NYC this weekend
  11.  I got my period at beginning of week and not during the conference this weekend #cramps
  12. My bed
  13. I’m okay
  14. I learn something new every day
  15. The color red
  16. Contacts
  17. Pens and pencils
  18. Leopard print

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